Surrogacy discourse has intensified recently, with high-profile cases and legal battles bringing commercial surrogacy into the national spotlight. As more families turn to surrogates to build their families, the voices of surrogates themselves are often missing from the conversation. The Guardian spoke with four surrogates across the US to understand their motivations, experiences, and views on the growing public debate.
Why Women Choose to Become Surrogates
For many surrogates, the decision is deeply personal. Liggia Spicer, a 34-year-old from upstate New York, was inspired by a friend who needed a surrogate after cancer treatment. "I wanted to help another family," she says. After two years of research, she embarked on the journey with an agency called ConceiveAbilities. The screening process was rigorous, including background checks, financial reviews, and psychological evaluations.
Other surrogates share similar stories. Some are motivated by a desire to give back, while others have witnessed loved ones struggle with infertility. Regardless of the reason, all emphasize that surrogacy is a calling, not a casual choice.
The Surrogacy Process: What It Really Involves
Becoming a surrogate is not for the faint of heart. Most programs require that a woman has previously given birth and is in good health. The process includes medical screenings, legal contracts, and psychological assessments. Spicer described the screening as "vigorous" but necessary to ensure the well-being of all parties.
Once matched with intended parents, surrogates undergo IVF transfers, prenatal care, and ultimately, delivery. They often develop close bonds with the families they help, though boundaries are carefully maintained.
Key Steps in the Surrogacy Journey
- Application and screening: Background checks, medical history review, and psychological evaluation.
- Matching: Finding intended parents with aligned values and expectations.
- Legal contracts: Establishing parental rights and compensation terms.
- Medical process: IVF, embryo transfer, and prenatal care.
- Delivery and postpartum: Birth and emotional support after delivery.
Emotional and Ethical Considerations
Surrogates often face questions about attachment and the emotional impact of carrying a child for someone else. Most say they are able to maintain a clear understanding that the child is not theirs. However, the recent case of McKenna West, a gestational surrogate who fled to Texas to avoid an abortion requested by the biological parents, highlights the complex legal and ethical dilemmas that can arise.
The surrogates interviewed stress the importance of clear communication and legal protections. They also express frustration with misconceptions about their motives, such as the idea that they are solely motivated by money.
Surrogacy Compensation: Myths vs. Reality
Compensation for surrogates varies widely. While some receive a base fee plus expenses, others may receive less depending on the arrangement. The table below outlines typical compensation ranges in the US.
| Type of Surrogacy | Average Compensation | Additional Expenses Covered |
|---|---|---|
| Gestational (agency) | $40,000–$60,000 | Medical, legal, travel, lost wages |
| Gestational (independent) | $25,000–$40,000 | Varies, often limited |
| Traditional | $20,000–$35,000 | Medical, legal |
Many surrogates point out that the compensation is not a windfall; it often goes toward childcare, household expenses, or savings for their own families.
The Impact of Public Discourse on Surrogates
With surrogacy in the news, surrogates feel both seen and scrutinized. Some worry that negative portrayals could lead to stricter regulations or discourage women from becoming surrogates. Others hope that increased awareness will lead to better support systems and legal clarity.
All four women agree that the focus should remain on the intended outcome: helping families grow. They urge the public to listen to surrogates' stories rather than relying on sensationalized headlines.
FAQ
What qualifications do you need to become a surrogate?
Most agencies require that you have given birth at least once, are between 21 and 45 years old, have a healthy BMI, and pass medical and psychological screenings. A stable financial situation and support system are also important.
How much do surrogates get paid?
Compensation varies based on location, agency, and type of surrogacy. In the US, gestational surrogates typically earn between $40,000 and $60,000, plus expenses. Independent arrangements may pay less.
Do surrogates have legal rights?
Yes, surrogates have legal rights, which are outlined in a contract. These include the right to medical care, compensation, and in some cases, the right to make decisions about their own body. Laws vary by state, so legal counsel is essential.
As the surrogacy discourse continues, the stories of these four women remind us of the human element behind the headlines. Their experiences highlight the need for empathy, legal clarity, and support for all involved in the surrogacy journey.
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