Everyone’s Seen My Tits: Former Page 3 Model’s Play 2026

Claire Hodges
Everyone’s Seen My Tits: Former Page 3 Model’s Play
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Former Page 3 model Keeley Hazell reveals how topless modelling never aligned with her true self, and how her new play Everyone’s Seen My Tits reclaims her voice. In this exclusive interview, she opens up about shame, identity, and the journey from tabloid fame to feminist storytelling.

Keeley Hazell: From Page 3 to the Stage

Keeley Hazell rose to fame in the mid-2000s as one of the UK’s most recognisable glamour models, gracing the pages of tabloids and lads’ mags. But behind the glossy photos, she felt a deep disconnect. “Topless modelling never really aligned with me as a person,” she says, reflecting on the excitement mixed with shame she experienced.


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Leaving modelling in her early 20s, Hazell moved to Los Angeles to pursue acting. Yet the emotional impact of her career lingered, inspiring her 2025 book Everyone’s Seen My Tits: Stories and Reflections from an Unlikely Feminist. Now, she’s bringing her story to the Edinburgh Fringe as a theatre/comedy show, exploring the multiple identities she inhabited.

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The Emotional Weight of Glamour Modelling

Hazell describes the writing process as a “release,” giving herself a voice for a period when she felt voiceless. She compares the show to Russian dolls: “I’m performing as me, but then I’m also performing as a version of me.” This duality was a survival mechanism, as she presented differently in public—often in vintage, grungey clothes—so she was rarely recognised.

When asked if she was a Page 3 model, she would deny it, testing reactions. “I’d be like, ‘Are you saying I look like a Page 3 model?’ And they’d often say, ‘No, no, you’re way more classy than that.’” This strange separation from her own image highlights the complex psychology of fame and self-perception.

Key Themes in the Play

  • Identity and reinvention – How we present ourselves vs. who we truly are
  • Feminism and empowerment – Reclaiming narrative from objectification
  • Shame and healing – Confronting past trauma through art
  • Celebrity culture – The price of public visibility

From Hair Salon to Headlines

Hazell’s entry into modelling was accidental. At 16, she left school to work in a hair salon, where a colleague encouraged her to apply to modelling agencies. She sent photos to “a bunch of addresses,” one of which was the Daily Star—launching her unexpected career. This rapid rise left little time to process the implications.

Now, she’s turning that experience into a platform for conversation, challenging audiences to reconsider the human behind the image. Her play is not just a memoir but a call to action for greater empathy and understanding.

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Comparison: Glamour Modelling Then vs. Now

Aspect Mid-2000s Page 3 Era Current Landscape
Media Platform Print tabloids, lads’ mags Social media, OnlyFans
Public Discourse Limited, often objectifying More feminist critique, body positivity
Model Agency Low, often exploited Greater control, but new risks
Representation Narrow beauty standards Diverse voices, but still challenges

Why This Play Matters

Hazell’s story resonates beyond her personal journey. It speaks to anyone who has felt trapped by public perception or struggled to reconcile their inner self with their outer image. By baring her soul—not her body—she flips the script, turning objectification into empowerment.

The play offers a raw, humorous, and poignant look at fame, feminism, and the courage to redefine oneself. It’s a must-see for fans of celebrity memoirs, feminist art, and anyone curious about the human cost of glamour.

FAQ

What is Everyone’s Seen My Tits about?

The play is based on Keeley Hazell’s 2025 book, exploring her life as a former Page 3 model, the shame and excitement of fame, and her journey to self-acceptance and feminist identity.

When and where is the play performed?

The show is being prepared for the Edinburgh Fringe, with performances scheduled in 2025. Check official listings for exact dates and venue.

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Why did Keeley Hazell leave modelling?

She left in her early 20s to pursue acting in LA, but also because topless modelling conflicted with her personal values, leading to emotional distress.

Final Thoughts

Keeley Hazell’s transformation from Page 3 pin-up to feminist playwright is a powerful testament to personal growth. Her play Everyone’s Seen My Tits is more than a memoir—it’s a mirror held up to society’s treatment of women’s bodies. Don’t miss this thought-provoking piece at the Edinburgh Fringe.

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Claire Hodges

Author

Claire Hodges

Claire Hodge is a seasoned writer and the head of content for the "Celebrities & Culture" magazine at Grand Goldman. With a background in journalism and a passion for Pop Culture / Fashion, she brings a unique blend of expertise and creativity. Her insightful articles and in-depth interviews have made her a bold voice in the industry, known for her ability to capture the idiosyncrasies of celebrity lives and cultural trends.


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